I will

I will write. I will write my book.

Youngjun's Model

South Korean Actor Hyeon-jae Jo

Painful

Writing this novel is never fun for me. I don't enjoy writing in English. It is my second language. I have to check every phrase and clause to see if it is grammatically correct. I am not saying all native speakers are flawless in their mother tongues, but because I am an ESL writer, my mistakes are clearer before exacting eyes. When it comes to the articles, I am always afraid of getting them wrong.

When I read books, essays, and papers in English, I shudder in frustration and shame. My command of English is inadequate to produce a novel. Why then do I want to write it?

I am not even sure if I can finish this manuscript in my second language, and find a publisher in a foreign land, and somehow make it appealing to the people that I don't fully understand.

My Lord, you are the only one I am relying on. Give me some inspirations, hold me with your right hand, and believe in me when I don't trust myself.

Youngjun and Song

"It was because… more so than anything else…

you were with me.”

Song's Family Photograph

March 8, 1937

Map of Pyongyang

Map of Pyongyang

Writing a Novel (March 24, 2010)

1. Writing a novel is not an easy task. Creating my own world in which characters live, talk, and interact with each other is time-consuming and yet durable. The real challenge is how to present it to the outside world. I have written a substantial part of the first chapter but as my computer crashed last night, I need to start anew. This tragic accident gave me a chance to look back what I have done, identify problems of my writing process, and fix them. It might have been a blessing in disguise. I decided to hand-write my first draft and keep track of changes for now.

2. According to my theory, a good novel consists of three components.
- original and beautiful expressions
- a well-structured plot with vivid characters
- meaningful messages (not straight-forward or didactic lessons but equivocal, open-ended, and universally applicable questions)
The first factor requires language fluency, emotional sensitivity, and attentiveness.
The second factor relies on innate creativity and yet can be improved over time.
The third factor - the most important one - needs serious thinking and painstaking planning.

3. The fallacy of my previous writing process was that it lacked the planning phase. I did not have concrete understanding of what I was writing. When I wrote the part where Samnam explains the reason for naming Song after the pine, I did not have sufficient information on the pine tree. So, I googled it online, took some materials and put them in the story right away. The final piece became untidy patchwork rather than flawless silk. From now on, I need to fully digest knowledge, before using it.